Under What Circumstances Would I Hire A Coach?
Whether you are stuck, experiencing a gap between where you are now and where you’d like to be or pursuing a goal or result that continues to elude you and you’d like to leverage the power of my trained listening to discern the interrelated factors causing that barrier. These are some of the typical circumstances that cause clients to reach out to me. In the next column you’ll see real questions from real people that resulted in coaching engagements. You’re not alone!
I'm a shareholder in a family business and I find myself caught up in family drama. What can I do?
Oh the dynamics of being involved in a family business, it’s complicated and… it really doesn’t have to be. So many hats to wear, so many interrelated factors to consider. Clarity, structure and open, honest communication are some areas to strengthen to bring harmony to the business. How does your team rate in these areas?
I've been married for over 5 years and my relationship is feeling stagnant. How do I get our love back to where it was?
Stagnation in long term relationship is an invitation to reinvent and an opportunity to take the relationship deeper. With every minute that goes by, you both are changing however, habitual, automatic ways of listening to your partner can get in the way of seeing them anew. Love isn’t lost, it’s just buried underneath all the stuff you’re holding on each other. What methods do you have to clear the air and return to love?
I have achieved more than most in my 35 years of life. I'm ashamed to say that I'm still deeply unhappy. How do I find Joy?
Ah, we so long to make a difference in the world. Come the end of our days, we want to know that our lives have mattered. Accessing joy is a deeply personal journey of rediscovery, a realigning with our life’s purpose and a beautiful surrendering to what you’ve probably been resisting. It may or may not mean you leave your job, your life, your relationship, changing the external pieces are what you’ve been doing. Accessing joy is an inside job.
My team and I have been charged with delivering on a special project. It will require us to achieve something we've never done before. Where do we even begin?
We might begin by exploring the team dynamics and the lens through which each individual member views themselves, the organization, the team, the project and the impact of a myriad of other factors in the system. It is very typical for an organization’s culture and context to wreak havoc on performance and effectiveness and can be difficult to spot from within. Despite this, a great place to begin is to examine your own beliefs about the project and to explore any past experiences getting in the way of this future focused challenge. Often a team is exhibiting an amplified version of their leader’s context. What’s getting in your way?
My business has plateaued, I have a feeling there's something I'm missing. How do I achieve a goal that's eluded me for several years?
There are so many ways to explore this fabulous question. We could begin with a focus on language, reframing the question to a declaration of what you will do. A declaration invents the future and immediately brings a new reality into being by its mere utterance. It is powerful, impacts others and causes the impossible. Try it… what declaration are you willing to make about your business? Hint: Stay out of the weeds of “how” you will cause the declaration.
Come on, take a time out from this crazy world and enter the vortex with me… “Are there any original ideas, ever?”
Making Sense of Me
Several years ago I hired someone who took all my old family home movies (VHS) and converted them to a digital format. My kids have long since flown the nest, both of them successful, loving humans.
How is your ability to focus these days? You know, the ability to focus without distraction on a cognitively demanding task? Our ability to focus without distraction “is a skill that allows us to quickly master complicated information and produce better results in less time.”
Briliantly described by Alan Sieler, “Ontological coaching focuses on the way of being of clients. Way of being is regarded as central to how people learn, function and change and is considered to be the underlying driver of behaviour and communication, for it is where an individual’s perceptual patterns and attitudes exist, many of which can be deep-seated and out-of-awareness.
Ontological coaching seeks to respectfully facilitate the transformation of being, which can include deep change, resulting in the client: (i) becoming a very different observer of themselves and the world, (ii) significant behavioural change, including relating more constructively with others and (iii) expanding what is possible in how they create their future.”
“Tracey’s manner is gentle, yet calls big greatness forward. She is warm, humorous, and through her varied and full-out life experiences, she is relatable to wide swathes of the population. I hired her recently to bring a professional, open, and secure presence to my new team who were meeting for the first time. It was a great success, and all present have fed back to me on how much they enjoyed and valued Tracey’s presence and leadership. This value has created a cohesive team very quickly who are moving forward with high confidence in each other and the business concepts.”
Sarah Wright, Consultant
“As a relatively new business owner, I benefitted greatly from Tracey’s experience and interpretations of (at that time) the current developments in our market, personnel, and business strategy. She provided a differing and most helpful view into situations that required new action to produce the desired outcome. I would use her again without reservation.”
Brad Rambur, Controls Integrity
“My experience working with Tracey has been insightful, inspiring, and especially productive. Tracey has helped me navigate and remove the barriers that prevented me from progress in several key areas of my life. Her wisdom, compassion, and ability to guide my attention to these barriers and empower me to move through them has been instrumental for my growth in business and as a person. Further, the style of coaching Tracey uses makes it possible for me to apply the skills I’ve learned for ongoing success. Thank you Tracey!”
Tamara Pierson, Adventure Dog